You can learn to love yourself. Start from the basic – Act like you love yourself, but most of the world. Think what you would do to someone who is like you. Then do that to yourself. Doesn’t matter if it is about delicious dinner, an exclusive weekend, buying new clothes that you didn’t need…
 
After that, go through your past, remember the things you wanted to do when you grow up, but you have not had the opportunity, time, space …

Recall your talents that may have never developed and experiment with them. Maybe your parents think you are talent for mathematics, and so now you are successful manager that handles high numbers, but somewhere in you, there is still ballerina, painter or writer who calls you to turn on the music and dance, to take the brush and colors and paint, or to start to write… 

If you haven’t used your talents still, does not mean that they are gone. Maybe with your talents you can not make a successful career, but they will become a part of your personality, they will fulfill your daily life, you will discover maybe a new dimension of yourself and thereby change your perception of the surrounding.

You have to build self-esteem first. You build self-esteem with approval and support for what you are doing, want or think. Again, many grow up without the recognition, in an environment in which mistake is rebuked and success is a “normal” thing. Go out from that model of behavior and start to be to yourself the biggest support.

Surely you are surrounded by wonderful friends and colleagues, people you respect and love, with whom you share the problems – their and your own. You always have time for comforting sentences, walking, endlessly understanding, assuring them that they are strong, they are not wrong, they can do it…

And how much time, energy and understanding, and nice words, you have for yourself? When have you talked last time with yourself about things that you are going through, praised yourself for a number of successes you have achieved, said to yourself that you are special, strong and perfect just as you are?

Probably most of you are better support to other people than to yourself. Moreover, you are likely stricter to yourselves and more demanding than to anyone else. Ok. on the road of personal affirmation and building your character you must be disciplined, but the boundaries must exist. Did you set your boundaries a little bit too far, because, simply – you didn’t learn to love yourself? 

Perhaps it is a time that your internal dialogues become gentler, to begin to talk with yourself like you talk with your partner, friends who want to help you to overcome the bad period. From time to time it’s good to replace bad reviews about yourself with positive, encouraging thoughts. That is very valuable for your self-esteem. You have to take care about your ego, he has to feel strong and powerful. 

You have to encourage yourself to start to explore again, experiment, to show feelings, express views, develop your individuality. You have to learn that the only person who can tell you that something what you are doing is good or bad is the one you see in the mirror every day!

When you start to love yourself, you will learn to trust your feelings. You will not need anymore the other people to tell you how you look and what you are thinking. You will not seek shelter in other people, you will not enter in relationships because you don’t want to be alone or simply you need to take care about someone. 

Ask yourself whether you are the one who is trying to keep everything under control in your relationship, to organize everything, prepare, predict, who adjusted his/her own plans, change and cancels appointments to adjust to the partner? Consider why are you doing that?

Are you afraid that you will not meet expectations, that you don’t “deserve” love, that you will be left? The good news for you is: love is not something what you can deserve, love your partner, show your feelings and show that you care, but try to love yourself a little bit more. Show your partner that you respect yourself, your time and your needs. On that way, your partner will start to love you more. 

Make a decision that from today you will love yourself unconditionally, because such a love should be. Unconditional. Love everything what you are, what you have done, what you think, what you feel, all… Love your spirit, your energy, your body – just as it is! 

When you succeed in that, when you learn to love your uniqueness, you will give yourself the most precious gift in the world that last a lifetime. 

And something more… 

Our Mirror

“The good you find in others, is in you too. The faults you find in others, are your faults as well. After all, to recognize something you must know it. The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well. The beauty you see around you, is your beauty. The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are. To change your world, you must change yourself. To blame and complain will only make matters worse. Whatever you care about, is your responsibility. What you see in others, shows you yourself. See the best in others, and you will be your best. Give to others, and you give to yourself. Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful. Admire creativity, and you will be creative. LOVE and you will be loved. Seek to understand, and you will be understood. LISTEN, and your voice will be heard. Teach, and you will learn”.  Unknown